Readers Respond: One Does Not Simply… [Insert Wood Floor Scenario]

382322890 878290900697790 2660262191775710294 N

WFB asked followers on Facebook and Instagram to fill in the blank with a wood flooring scenario for this popular meme. Here’s what they said:

Lars Frohnsdorf

Lightly sand a floor.

Lorie Davidson

Turn red oak into white oak.

Eric Nylin

Work five years and become a Pro. 🙃

Bee Ha

Turn on a flashlight and lay on the floor to check for imperfection.

Chuck Kutchera

Walk into wet finish.

Ryan Johnson

Get your 10 foot scratch out ...

Clint Fudge

Start without a 50% deposit.

Steve Heineken

Give discounts to family or friends. 😝😂😝😂😝

Mike Andrew

Stain without the pop.

Brian Webb

Watch me install or sand your floor.

Mike Andrew

Rough and buff.

Ron Teljeur

Start installing on arrival.

Bradford Lawson

Sand their own floor successfully as a homeowner.

Gregg Pierce

Apply first coat until it’s absolutely ready.

Bernie Bates

Make the floor lighter without sanding.

Mike Hanning

Match your 30 year old finish!

Julian Jack Ball

Install a floor without a moisture reading.

Anthony Boccia

Lay hybrid and expect to match the timber stairs.

Barry Oliver

Give a "ball park number."

Steve Heineken

One does not simply wear white pants to a stain job.

Beaver Hardwood

Start sanding a floor. First there is coffee. Then we haul in 40 tools. Then we look for power.

Roy Aull Jr.

Have one Festool product.

Brant Sheets

Cover up hardwood floors.

Bradley Kidder

Agree to a lower price.

Roy Aull Jr.

Match the lower estimate.

Dustless Hardwood Floors

Sand, stain and finish in one day.

Michael Gwin

Screen and recoat.

Bill Loba-Wakol

Rent a floor sander from the Home Depot rental department.

Anthony Boccia

Coat a floor overnight.

Wesley Goetz

Know what time I'll be done.


…install hardwood to the subfloor.


Sand their own floors. 👏


Assume your breaker box is in your kitchen cupboard.


DIY refinishing a floor.


Collect the check…


Step onto the freshly sanded floor that’s been prepped for first coat.


Tape the paper to the floor.


One does not simply give discounts to family and friends.


Make a real wood floor look like vinyl plank flooring.


Put a line down!


Touch up one board!


From today… “Match that white stain that has been down for five years.”


Color match your vinyl plank sample.


Lay a wood floor without moisture testing!


…Buff out a new refrigerator install.


Stain a floor without a signed sample!

Page 1 of 20
Next Page
Resource Book
Looking for a specific product or a company? Wood Floor Business has the only comprehensive database of the industry.
Learn More
Resource Book
All Things Wood Floor, created by Wood Floor Business magazine, talks to interesting wood flooring pros to share knowledge, stories and tips on everything to do with wood flooring, from installation, sanding and finishing to business management.
Learn More